Due to a rift in the space-time continuum in the Moroniverse, Damien Hurlbutt made a brief appearance yesterday, August 10th. We apologize for the technical difficulties. Damien is back at Area 51, serving as a test subject for fart removal experiments. Thankfully he did not poop out any cakes.
This guy is Pat Splatt’s biggest fan! Thank you Internet stranger for role-playing as Kankakee’s biggest huckster and junk-emailer! Pat thanks you for all the love and for taking time outta your busy day to slide into the inbox of the We Are CRASS business page on Facebook.
Don’t want to see that post? Just refresh Fakebook and you will see it again on a recursive loop! Why do senior leaders at mega-corporations get paid a lot of money to make moronic decisions? Just like a dog licking his ‘nads, they do it because they CAN.
Kankakee Rappers Ty-Fowl and D-Fail (Tyrell Fowler and Doug Failure) debut their new Extended Play rap record, “All About Us!”
Coming soon to AudioCumulus!
“Where is the jungle gym?” Chanel Teirant asks the busy Bourbonnais café staff, while her sister * dances and brother Bratley joins her pirouette. Mother and Dumpster Clown Madeline Topolla-Teirant Cheers them on.
“Ma’am, this is a Buckstars.”
Dealing with narcissists can be a real hurdle. They cross boundaries like it is a competition. Who will win?
Manteno communal narc-a-doodle and entremanure Bernadette Cacca, who plays charity accordion-covers only for the photo opportunity?
Peppi Cacca who only have love for skunkweed?
Kankakee’s Number One Elvis impersonator (who thinks he is really Elvis) and vulnerable narc Robbie Hurlbutt?
Does anybody need to win?
Coming soon: Narc Island – Where all the narcissists are cast away to an uninhabited island to fend for themselves – and leave the rest of us alone. Stay tuned!
“Kevin” made Sybil Kibble an offer she could certainly refuse, so why won’t he accept her coupons as payment? All he had to do was give me his address.
“Mary” from Delhi, India called from a spoofed New York number to ask nosey medical questions.
MoronicArts wasted this scammer’s time boring her about Gothic Diana Ross, Peppi’s Portopotties and Norilsk, Russia so she cannot use that time to try and rip off other people.
Get a real job, “Mary.”
Manteno miner of Craptocoin, pretend do-gooder and entramanure Bernadette Moran Cacca, has competition up in Chicago for biggest bail-bond buffoonery.
Kankakee bill collector and dog-food connoisseur Sybil Kibble gets lost in a book, taking her mind off the day-to-day horrors working at CRASS.
MoronicArts 
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