Fertilized Minds

Daily writing prompt
Jot down the first thing that comes to your mind.

“This skunkweed ain’t skunky enough. Gotta add more port-a-pee.”
– Peppi Cacca, Fartner, Peppi’s Portapotties


“Not more flatulence testing! Stop feeding me corn and send me home!”
– Damien Hurlbutt, world’s largest source of natural gas, test subject at Area 51’s Alternative Fuels Division

“I keep circling and circling…I’m getting hangry…gotta be some fresh carrion around here somewhere.”
– Carla Moran, Shapeshifting humanoid turkey vulture, Sterile supply technician


“These dog bones are making me constipated! I want a refund!”
– Sybil Kibble, bill collector, Credit Recovery Associates (CRASS)


“What are they burning now?”
– Gothic Diana Ross, Singer and Vet Tech

“Poop!”
– Bernadette Cacca, Entramanure

Wally’s Wacky Wares

Daily writing prompt
Jot down the first thing that comes to your mind.

How dumb are the stupid regulations here in the United States that restaurants are required to put Fool’s Bread on every sandwich wrap and Camouflage Straw-paper on every straw? So dumb that Wally Green sells every variety!

Fool your friends, creep out your customers and puke-induce your patients with Wally’s patented Fakeout Paper every time they take a bite! Instant sensory overload guaranteed!

Buy one pallet, get one half off (but never free) at your corner Wally Green’s, home of the Turd Machine and the Wallyt! While you’re there, say hi to Deerfield native and Kankakee resident, Mr. Walter Augustine Green himself. The self-proclaimed “nice guy” is single and ready to mingle, ladies!