“You know, Bernadette: You cannot exactly drift a car with your suspension out of whack,” Gothic Diana Ross says to her next door neighbor Bernadette Cacca, as she peels out her Manteno driveway for the zillionth time and veers to the side of the road, releasing an awful stench since her oil is running on fumes.
“Are you burning rubber, or are you burning poopies?”
This Moron slid into Kankakee debt collector and dog-food enthusiast Sybil Kibble’s inbox and would not let go. Silly scammer, get a hobby.
Kankakee County karaoke king, poor Elvis impersonator and covert narcissist Robbie Hurlbutt was so happy to finally get some people at one of his many gigs. Robbie believes in quantity over quality, or staying “prolific”, as Robbie says. Too bad his speedball dealer showed up.
Happy Singles Awareness Day from the crew at MoronicArts!
Why be alone, when you could be with Damien, president of the Bourbonnais Mens’ Rights Activists Club?
At age 12, Kankakee inventor of useless crap and future drugstore owner put on his thinking cap to draw up some rather…interesting concept sketches for an invention he started selling on late night TV. Yeah.
Based in Manteno, Illinois — Peppi and Bernadette Cacca own and operate Peppi’s Port-o-Potties.
“King and Queen of the Throne”
Peppi’s hobbies are drinking, puking and smoking cheap weed, the skunkier the better.
Bernadette’s hobbies are singing loudly, playing accordion and hanging out in the swamp so she can lure unsuspecting men. Bernadette has recorded herself badly singing opera and showtunes to play for on-hold customers in the hope they will hang up.
Meet Lori Brown, estranged former wife of Bourbonnais neckbeard Damien Hurlbutt. A covert narcissist, Damien refers to Lori solely as “Grimace” while actively trying to get back with her so he can emotionally abuse her again. Lori works as a medical billing clerk in Chicago, loves root beer and burning poopies.
Read about Lori here:
https://moronicarts.com/2019/11/26/damien-exposed/
https://moronicarts.com/2020/07/24/damien-dumped/
https://moronicarts.com/2020/11/04/crass-ahoy/
Blink and you’ll miss the house of Bourbonnais neckbeard Damien Hurlbutt, but maybe you’ll want to.
MoronicArts 
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