Lunacy Letter From Damien

September 24, 2021September 24, 2021 ~ Jen ~ 21 Comments

Illinois neckbeard, communal narcissist and movie theater clerk Damien Hurlbutt went off the deep end when his then-wife, Lori, stopped tolerating his verbal abuse and rightfully left him.

He sent this letter to her psychologist and her psychiatrist after she separated from him. Apparently, this ticket clerk thought he knew more about psychology than the licensed clinicians who practice. The latter provider called it a “lunacy letter.” The former said she had never seen anything like it in all her years practicing.

Who makes up this stuff?

Oh yeah, people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

The Narcissist Brothers – Robbie and Damien Hurlbutt

April 7, 2021 ~ Jen ~ 1 Comment

A black and white drawing featuring concentric circles, a cartoon of an Elvis impersonator and a neckbeard wearing a fedora. Text: Robbie, Damien. Old Supply, New Supply. You Got It, We Want It.
Robbie and Damien — New Supply, Old Supply — You Got It, We Want it.

They know what they want, and they want it right now!

Call D. U. Hurlbutt at 500-FART-NOW

Inferior Model Replicants

April 4, 2020 ~ Jen ~ Leave a comment

Behold, the Tyrell Corporation’s inferior model Nexus replicants:

Nexus-1 was their Turd Burglar model. All he could do was steal turds out of unsuspecting people’s toilets.

Nexus-2 had the strength and agility of the Nexus-1, and more skills. However, he lacked focus and was very lazy, spending most of his time trying to pick up women and failing.

Nexus-3, lacked the empathy of previous model replicants. He was built to stay on task and had good focus. However, he gained too much weight from eating burgers and fries at the Los Angeles In-and-Out Burger joints and had to be be retired.

She’s A Mad, Mad, Woman

July 14, 2019July 14, 2019 ~ Jen ~ Leave a comment

Meet Madeline “Madwoman” Topolla-Teirant, wife of CRASS Accounting Chief Konrad “Kon Man” Teirant and mother to his kids.

Madeline met Konrad while drafting up his real estate deeds to ensure no other multiplexes can come to Kankakee. Human Resources Manager and Chief of Security at a low income housing complex, Madeline has a reputation for verbally abusing tenants. The superintendent calls her his “biggest asset”, however the tenants call her other things. Madeline gets her reputation as Madwoman for calling tenants “childish little girls”, literally pointing her fingers and telling them to do their own maintenance.

Madeline loves Nora Roberts novels and spends her free time away from her husband and children, sitting at the local bookstore reading. However, she never spends a penny, putting them all back on the store shelves after she finishes the endings.