Tag: moronic

Damien Cannot Wait to See his Mother’s Face.

~ Jen ~ 1 Comment

Bourbonnais neckbeard Damien Hurlbutt is buying his mother PJ one of those PeeATon bikes he saw on TV for Christmas. He wants her to lose weight. Isn’t he a real tenderheart?

Damien Exposed

~ Jen ~ 1 Comment

Neckbeard Damien Hurlbutt checks his Mens’ Rights Activists (MRA) social media group for new activity, only to find a feminist posing as one of the guys exposed the entire group’s activity. Sucks to be Damien! Maybe try not being an MRA next time, Mr. Hurlbutt?

Sybil’s Got a Dating Site Match!

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Sybil Kibble has matched very closely with this single guy. He drives a Chrysler LeBaron just like Sybil does. They could drive off into the sunset in matching cars. Sybil is going to write to him and ask this do-it-yourselfer if he will eat dog food if she fixes it for him.

https://cheezburger.com/9707781/bill-the-tinder-profile-weve-been-waiting-for

Wally the Pet Petter

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Wacky Kankakee inventor Wally Green is just kicking himself for not having thought of this invention first. Just think of all the money he could have made from selling them in Wally Green’s Drugstores! Could the special pet person in your life use a Pet Petter?

Birthday Greetings to Sybil Kibble!

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Happy Birthday to Sybil Kibble! We hope your day is a real treat!

She has the skills that pay the bills, alright

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Kankakee Bill Collector Sybil Kibble cannot wait to take her break doubling down on debtors so she can have a snack. Yum!

Damien is Number One Alright

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Bourbonnais, Illinois narcissist and fedora-sporting neckbeard Damien Hurlbutt, nortorious for writing his lunacy letters, posted this new picture to his dating ad on Tindling. What do you think?

She’s A Mad, Mad, Woman

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Meet Madeline “Madwoman” Topolla-Teirant, wife of CRASS Accounting Chief Konrad “Kon Man” Teirant and mother to his kids.

Madeline met Konrad while drafting up his real estate deeds to ensure no other multiplexes can come to Kankakee. Human Resources Manager and Chief of Security at a low income housing complex, Madeline has a reputation for verbally abusing tenants. The superintendent calls her his “biggest asset”, however the tenants call her other things. Madeline gets her reputation as Madwoman for calling tenants “childish little girls”, literally pointing her fingers and telling them to do their own maintenance.

Madeline loves Nora Roberts novels and spends her free time away from her husband and children, sitting at the local bookstore reading. However, she never spends a penny, putting them all back on the store shelves after she finishes the endings.