
Alone at the bar after a hard day thinking up useless inventions, Kankakee drugstore owner and tall-tale-teller Wally Green slowly sips his beer hoping a pretty lady would walk in wearing a big smile. Think again, Wally.

Alone at the bar after a hard day thinking up useless inventions, Kankakee drugstore owner and tall-tale-teller Wally Green slowly sips his beer hoping a pretty lady would walk in wearing a big smile. Think again, Wally.

Town troll Leona Krabalsky runs from under her bridge between Kankakee and Bourbonnais after Manteno sociopath and port-a-potty entremanure Peppi Cacca confronts her for selling fake drugs. Peppi brags he has “ARI: Armed Redneck Insurance.”

Sybil Kibble takes out the trash after Damien stalks her.

They know what they want, and they want it right now!
Call D. U. Hurlbutt at 500-FART-NOW

CRASS debt collector Dale Davis finally got his economic stimulus check, so he made a big donation to the Illinois State Lottery.

Happy Easter from JoAnn, Sybil and PJ. What are you doing today? The Kankakee crew are squirrel-watching.

Toe Stubberies
Do you like pain? These might look like rollers, but these metal cylinders are designed to give you extra toe-stubbage! Perfect for your bedframe or office chair.
Extra Ploppety Pills
Do you like it when things fall? Increase your plop factor using the power of entropy mixed into every pill you swallow! Now when you visit Wally Green’s Pharmacy Department, be sure to ask for our patented ingredient!
No More Cord Tangles
Pour on your electronics cords to get the tangles out! This liquid works best when your devices are plugged in.
What will Deerfield, Illinois born drugstore owner, barfly and wannabe ladies’ man Wally Green invent next?


Manteno communal narcissist and poopy-burner Bernadette Cacca just discovered her new favorite tune. Maybe she will perform it live for charity on accordion.

Manteno sociopath Peppi Cacca and his communal narcissist wife Bernadette wish to advertise their business Peppi’s Portopotties on television. Bernadette plays accordion while her husband raps about how they are king and queen of the throne. Look for their new track on AudioCumulus.

“You know, Bernadette: You cannot exactly drift a car with your suspension out of whack,” Gothic Diana Ross says to her next door neighbor Bernadette Cacca, as she peels out her Manteno driveway for the zillionth time and veers to the side of the road, releasing an awful stench since her oil is running on fumes.
“Are you burning rubber, or are you burning poopies?”
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