Let’s Go, Brandon

Brandon Dixon, wannabe ladies’ man and owner of Brandon’s Imbecile Machines, parks his overly lifted and crudely decorated truck in a grocery store parking lot. Since the truck gives him such an ego-boost, and Brandon plain does whatever the heck he wants, he takes up two spaces.

Brandon continues to swipe right on his phone, hoping to introduce a single lady to his compensationmobile. Meanwhile, he hopes his massive truck attracts some attention from “the females” as Brandon calls them.

The sun goes down, and Brandon is still waiting for his first catch. A stern voice is heard from a person approaching him and his vehicle.

“Let’s go, Brandon!”

“Yeah, let’s go Brandon! Vote red all the way!” Brandon replies.

“No, I mean let’s go. Your truck is taking up two parking spaces and the store is closed. Leave or I will have to write you a ticket,” the lady cop expounds.

Needless to say, no matter how much size matters, Brandon’s huge truck impresses not a single soul.

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